Life isn’t always fair. Sometimes you don’t get the congratulations you want. Sometimes you don’t get the praise you feel like you deserve. Sometimes you don’t get the support you need. That’s why it’s important to give yourself the love, praise and support you need when others simply can’t or don’t know how.
My whole life has been this way. No matter what I do, things never seem to be good enough. I never lived a straight lined life, where everything just seemed to be easy. Instead, my journey had twists, turns and rough patches. Things were never handed to me. Friends didn’t come around easily. Learning was always a struggle.
I always thought there was something wrong with me from Day 1 in preschool. How sad is that? Literally, the very first experience I had with my peers was that of rejection as I was tripped by students coming into the classroom and laughed at as I lay on my stomach. I was told that I was too young to be there and that I didn’t belong with them.
The bullying continued throughout my life, and my self-esteem never grew. Depression and anxiety has been with me my whole life, but now is the first time I am able to outwardly express myself in a safe environment. Sadly, despite me becoming comfortable with who I am, others in my life don’t know what to do with me. They never had these problems growing up and they simply can’t relate to me.
It’s depressing to feel like you don’t belong when you are growing up, but it’s even more depressing when you realize that lack of belonging was not imagined and is the harsh reality you are now facing.
Buckle down as I begin to write my story of growing up…