Book number 2?

To begin a new book or not…that is the question I am constantly asking myself. Instead of giving myself a time frame on when I need to have it done, I’m just going to work on it when I feel inspiration flowing. It’s going to be my story. My own personal story of living with vaginismus in college. I’m changing the names of everyone, but the important aspects of the story will be there. In fact, I’m going to introduce the prologue for all of you here. Feel free to let me know what you think, and if it makes you feel like continuing to read more.

Things don’t always turn out like they are supposed to. Sometimes the things that are supposed to make the most sense simply don’t. I couldn’t comprehend how or why my life was suddenly spiraling out of my control. Nothing seemed fair. It was like a sick joke that the universe was playing on me right in front of my face. All I was certain of was that I couldn’t stop the inevitable train from running off the rails.

My future was meant to be one where I shared romance with my significant other, who I would grow old with. Our little family were all supposed to sit around campfires telling stories, opening presents on Christmas and enjoying a succulent turkey for Thanksgiving. Laughter would ring throughout the home, and my husband and I would smile lovingly into each other’s eyes, proud of the future we built and shared.

However, that future is not turning out the way I planned. My life is not turning out how I wanted it to. I highly doubt any man will ever want to spend his life with me, let alone gaze into my eyes with admiration. We live in a world where sex dominates, but what if you were one of the few who couldn’t have it?

I was 18 about to turn 19 and going into college. I was naive, I was innocent, and I didn’t know any better. It’s hard to imagine that something so simple can redefine your entire life; that something so simple can change people’s opinion of you and show their true colors.  My story isn’t pretty. It’s not some exciting adventure detailing my wonderful experiences of college. Instead, my story has a lot of heartbreak. It has a lot of pain, sadness, grief and, worst of all, abuse. My story isn’t for the faint-hearted. It’s not for those who get squeamish or feel uncomfortable talking about important issues in our society. Do you want to hear a real story about a young girl going through college with vaginismus? Well then, continue reading. However, if you want to remain in a bubble and pretend things like this never happen to people, then I suggest closing the book because my story is only going to get worse.